bunchofgrapes: (Dallas Cowboys)
[personal profile] bunchofgrapes
It's always been my favorite holiday and my memories of it as a kid seem to get better the older I get.



Our Thanksgiving consisted of my mom and I driving the hour from Tulsa to Bartlesville to my grandparent's house. They had a small house but it was always stuffed with people. The kitchen, the service porch and the dining room would be full of food and fat ladies in print dresses and kids in their best clothes and guys who at the time wore trousers with cuffs and polished shoes and hair oil to slick down the combover. These were my relatives or old friends of the family who became Aunt and Uncle because of friendship, not blood.

There really weren't a lot of kids--just me and my two cousins. My mom, my aunt and my uncle were definitely the youngest of the adults. The ladies always gathered around the table, the men always crowded around the TV in the living room and us kids sat wherever we could find a space. I was always with my grandpa around the TV, watching the Dallas Cowboys play football. That's how I got my love of the team. My grandpa loved the Cowboys, I idolized my grandpa, so the Cowboys will always be about him and those Thanksgiving day games. And yeah, I made myself cry thinking about that.

The food was always the best at Thanksgiving. My grandmother would make two kinds of dressing, one with oysters for the adults (as a kid I always thought oysters were some sort of adult food) and without for the kids. We'd have fifteen different kinds of pies, and eleven differents kids of salads (including the yummy kind with marshmallows) and turkey and ham because my mom doesn't like turkey, and black olives that us kids would put on all our fingers and run around looking like some sort of mutant tree frog. I was a tall, skinny kid (somewhere around puberty I shrunk and expanded out) surrounded by lots of great aunts as well as a grandmother and great grandmother and of course they would always tell me I needed to eat more pie. And who was I to say no? Thanksgiving was made for fattening up skinny kids and this was definitely before organics and zero trans fat and Smart Balance anything. Just FYI, my great grandmother is 103, soon to be 104 (she's got dementia but is in good health), and my grandmother is 84. My dad has always said the women in my family are too mean to die. He might be right.

I went home for Thanksgiving not long after I moved to Northern Virginia in 1987. My grandfather passed away in the mid 70's and my grandmother had remarried around the same time (they divorced in the early 70's). The old friends didn't come around any more and many of the old relatives had passed away. In their place were my step grandfather's dysfunctional kids. My aunt divorced my uncle and then married a man with two boys and they spent Thanksgiving with his parents. My mom was living with my stepfather then and they decided to do their own Thanksgiving with his kids and brothers. There wasn't a tradition any more and for me, the memories were just that. I haven't been back to Oklahoma for Thanksgiving since.

Now I go to my dad and stepmother's for Thanksgiving. They live about a mile away and my sister as well as a good family friend are there. I take my sweet potato casserole and arrive around 2pm. We don't eat until 4pm, which is always right when the Cowboys game starts (never fails). Sometimes I leave with a few leftovers but not often so I've started my own tradition. On Friday I make my own mini Thanksgiving meal. I buy a small boneless turkey, make stuffing and green bean casserole (the kind with French onions on top--I love that!) and more sweet potato casserole and a pumpkin pecan pie from an old Southern recipe. I share the turkey with the kitties and I get lots of leftovers. I love the leftovers.

This is my tradition now and I like it just fine. I'll always have the good memories of my childhood Thanksgiving and you know, that's what I'm thankful for. Well, that and Dallas Cowboy football...

Date: 2007-11-22 06:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mingsmommy.livejournal.com
What a lovely post.

Sometimes the saddest thing about growing up is growing out of traditions, but making new ones has its own value. I love that you have your own little Thanksgiving...that is lovely and healthy.

I am grateful for you, so thankful you are in my life. Happy Thanksgiving.

Date: 2007-11-22 07:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tos-lover.livejournal.com
Thanksgiving was quite foreign to us when we moved here when I was a teen, but it didn't take long to fill the table with friends on Thanksgiving. I love big Holiday meals with good food, lots of people and noise. It makes me feel all is right with the world for just one day, anyway.

Today we're going up to one of my brother's in SF and there's going to be a ton of people there. Of course he called me about ten times yesterday adding to the list of stuff we're taking. At this moment it consists of the ham, apple cranberry pie (I'm about to roll the pastry), a chair, 12 forks, 6 spoons, digital meat thermometer, and the fixings for me to make bread sauce when we get there. Yeah, I suggested that he may as well invite everyone down here instead.

The last couple of years we have done this and like you, we have another Thanksgiving on Friday with our friends, just so Bri has lots of leftovers. It's a nice extension to the holiday, because I am sure as heck not venturing anywhere tomorrow.

And as a 49er fan I can't believe I'm about to say this, but for you, I hope the Cowboys win today.

Happy T-day

Date: 2007-11-22 08:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] inamberclad.livejournal.com
That was lovely. Thanks for sharing that. I have so many family traditions I miss with both of my parents gone but there are the memories. And spending time with the lil' one, my sis and her family makes for a great Thanksgiving.

I'm really thankful for your friendship. Have a great day!!

Date: 2007-11-22 08:44 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Yay, for sweet potato casserole. How much do we love it! Loved your description of Thanksgiving as a child. Our was like that also. We always went to my grandparents for the Holiday. Both sets of my grandparents lived in the same town, so we always ate two meals. Hunting season seems to be a part of Thanksgiving. The men hunt during the morning, come in to eat and watch football in the afternoon.

Today, it's just my husband and me and the dogs. I like that. I like this Holiday being a little quiet with the Christmas rush coming. Only difference from yours is being the Lion fan. Not all of our Thanksgivings are happy, football wise. LOL.

It snowed last night and all the trees were flocked with snow this morning. It was beautiful outside. Now it's snowing again. Have a Happy Day, and my the Cowboys make it a perfect day.

N.

Date: 2007-11-23 03:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lasairfhiona.livejournal.com
There wasn't a tradition any more and for me, the memories were just that. I haven't been back to Oklahoma for Thanksgiving since.

Funny... That is exactly how it is for me now, only it was in Ohio.

It used to be us (me, mom and step-dad)going to my grandparents who live 1/4 mile away, or to cousins house. Grandma's sister Aunt Mickey and her family would be there (Uncle Don, Pat, Dan, Tom, Rob, Merrilee) we at 1:00pm-ish and then again at 6pm-ish. we had left overs to go home. as we aged, boyfriends/husbands, wifes, kids, another generation was added.

Grandpa got sick, then grandma, and it all stopped... Uncle Don died then Aunt Mickey, the family has scattered to all corners of the country now. It has been 17 years or so since one has happened. Now John and I just do whatever... WHen in Hawaii we went to the O-club, Now in Washington, we go to his families pot luck Thanksgiving. and occasionally have one at home when my parents are in town, which happened this year.

It's funny though that you should talk about tradition -- Mom and I were just talking about it this morning while cooking.

It's also kind of hard since 6 years ago on this weekend (to the date) we were burying my grandmother (7 months and 11 days after my grandfather died, she couldn't live without him)

Date: 2007-11-23 03:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lasairfhiona.livejournal.com
Forgot to say "Happy Thanksgiving"!

:)

Thankyou..

Date: 2007-11-24 02:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] unwrittenkitten.livejournal.com
Thankyou for that.

Ive put off reading your entry until today, because it seemed like something I wanted to read when I had time to enjoy it. And I was right to.

I've always loved traditions. Family dinners, gatherings, memories. My family didn't do that sort of thing. We're not very close to any extended family members, so the 'big family dinners' never happened. I remember one year where my Grandmother had one final dinner with what was left of her extended family. That was what it was supposed to be like. Lots of dishes.. food, laughter. I was very young, and it never happened again.

I always love hearing about other peoples gatherings. The food.. (Sweet Potato casserole? That sounds yummy!) the stories..

Thankyou for sharing yours with us. It is sad to see traditions go. But thats how new ones get started. And new memories to be looked back fondly on. The people at the dinners and gatherings you remember so fondly, more than likely miss the traditions of days gone by in their pasts as well.

To a future of memories, friends, and stories to look back and happily remember.

Re: Thankyou..

Date: 2007-11-29 07:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] unwrittenkitten.livejournal.com
Ooh.. yes please! That would be wonderful! Ive been on a real 'cooking' kick recently, and I LOVE Sweet Potatoes. I just never know how to cook them.

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