I'm really sorry, Beau. Loss is harder the longer you've had them, usually. I cried for months over a redtail hawk I'd only had fifteen weeks - he died of an aspergillosis infection he'd caught when first injured in the nest. I cried over Kye for longer than I'd had him. But that's an exception. You were with Emma eighteen years and that is a proper long-term relationship. Nothing can take the pain away but the pain itself. Just know that dead is not non-existent. I promise (and so do a lot of other people!) that dead is only back to the eternity ring. You'll feel her brush your legs again, just because she can.

I don't know if I should say this, or even if you'll believe me, but my middle name is Emma. It's there on my birth certificate! Too much synchronicity = queasy feelings. Brass gives me far too much synchronicity and soon I'm going to sue CBS for it. Can't really wish you a happy day, so I'll wish you good tears instead. The tears count as much as the laughter does. xxx

K